obama the iguana

Again, I know this is not meant to be a study on the animals around me and my reactions to them, but come on. I sat down two feet from a giant iguana today. I've named him to Obama in an effort to make him seem like a friend to all. I also saw a small, worm-sized SNAKE that is apparently blind. Can't make this shit up. I think this was told to me in an effort to make it seem less scary. I don't think this is a plus for me though. It just means it could accidentally come near me. Can you imagine. Of course I threw both myself and my bag up on the table which was a totally appropriate reaction in the middle of the music school courtyard... obviously.

In other news, M&M's has come out with two new products; pretzel filled and coconut filled M&M's. I had both of these in my arms to try, for purely scientific purposes of course, but I looked down and I was also holding oreos, chips ahoy, and wine.... so it seemed like I needed to edit. However, next time I need a chocolate fix, i.e. tomorrow, I'll let you know how these are!

Navigating Canada

Quiz: Is this a good idea?

1. Is it a good idea to let Laura borrow your car to drive in another country?

2. Is it a good idea to send Ian as her navigation partner?

3. Is it a good idea to take bets on how late she will be getting back?

Answer key: 1. no (2 points), 2. no (2 points) 3. absolutely no (give yourself negative 6000 points if you answered yes to this one!) It's not funny!

Day one at University of Miami... an odyssey as told through bugs... again

Ok I did not intend for the Miami adventure to be mostly about bugs, and that is also not my intention here, but come on. Have you seen the size of these things down here. I went to use the restroom today and saw a cockroach that could only be described as a cantaloupe sized bringer of heart attacks. It seems most fitting to start by tying Miami into Houston through none other than ICE CREAM! Now, since last time I wrote, I became lactose intolerant (gasp). This means I went like 3 months with no dairy whatsoever while I sorted out how to deal with this. However, THEY HAVE BLUEBELL ICE CREAM DOWN HERE!!!!!!! So, obviously the strike is over! I was so excited, I bought a gallon of the great divide (half chocolate, half vanilla) scooped a bowl, and danced around my kitchen to hotel California while eating it. I then got sick... but that's not the point! I don't know what the point is... but it was fun! So anyway, I will try and post every week or so in an effort to document this DMA but you and I both know this will end up being almost exclusively about bugs. And mark my words, the day I see a snake I am moving straight back up to Michigan... or possibly Indiana where I can bum off of a wonderful Geiser and Tarta.

Miami here we come

I'm leaving for my final audition in Miami, Florida in a few days. I'm ready for this to all be over! I tend to come up with brilliant life plans for myself every week or so on average... so it's weird for me that the idea of a doctoral degree and opera direction has stuck for as long as it has. I figure if I don't get back into school, I'll move somewhere fabulous like St. Lucia and stand on the beach singing for food. There is, of course, also the back up plan of selling fresh bagels out of a van, or the lifelong dream of hosting an infomercial, but it's important to be realistic in one's dreams and perhaps the infomercial idea creeps slightly beyond that. No matter what happens, I would just like to state now, in writing, that I will be at least successful enough to have an entire brand of chocolate named after me at some point... is that so much to ask? Unwrap a Laura!

I should rename the blog, but the lack of resulting confusion would be no fun

Well, I thought there was a strong possibility that I would end up back in Houston after a nice break living back in Michigan. That seems to no be in the cards anymore though, and as the great saying goes, when one door closes, don't pinch your fingers. So onward with the adventures of Laura in where ever she finds herself. This week, that means a road trip with Merry Beth to Maryland! I'm extremely excited to get the doctoral auditions underway, but also equally excited to spend some quality time singing loudly in the car with MB. Don't worry, she's in charge of navigation. You know you've been friends a long time when you don't even have to tell her she's in charge of navigation. To put Laura in charge of navigation would be such a hysterical joke, no one would even consider it a possibility. I was momentarily navigating on the 24 hour drive down to Houston, only to miss the ONE turn in the first 18 hours of the trip due to an enthralling game of 20 questions with Kal. Go ahead, ask him about it. He remembers! So anyway, wish me luck!!!!

special michigan update

I obviously never intended this to center only around creepy crawly things, but I find myself settled back in Michigan, only to find a GIANT SPIDER in my house! I know I have a tendency to exaggerate stories in an effort to make them more entertaining, but in the interest of pure accuracy, I will present actual facts for once. The spider, though I thought it was a tarantula at the time, was a wolf spider, about the size of half of my palm and very very fuzzy. I was alone at the time of discovery, and used prior knowledge of a bucket, a shoe and a glove, as adapted from the Houston lizard tongs, bucket, and shirt scenario. I did manage to get the spider (let's call him mortimer in hopes of making him seem cute and non threatening so I have a hope of sleeping ever again) outside without giving myself a heart attack, though some shaking was involved. I did consider standing in the room, on the table of course, and waiting until someone else got home to take care of it, but I had rehearsal and this counts as the ultimate example of the show must go on. I considered just walking away, but the only thing worse than a huge spider in your house, i's a lost huge spider in your house. The alarming end to mortimer is that I couldn't find him outside a few minutes later. I'm telling myself he's well on his way to a warmer land... maybe mars for example.

why 110 degrees is ridiculous

It was 91 degrees today with a heat index of 110. What is a heat index? It's how hot it actually feels with the humidity. That is too damn hot. Seriously, hot. In the car, hot. Outside, hot. Inside, hot. In the freezer, not hot, but not safe either if you remember that one punky brewster episode where she gets stuck in the fridge and dies... maybe she doesn't die, but I think that was the moral of the story. So the only way to deal with this is to flee the state. Sadly I have to wait two weeks to do this, but as long as I don't melt before that, things should be great.